Hello. My name is Natalie. I do not go to school. I am on medical leave after being in the mental hospital. I have attempted suicide a few times in life. One time more successful than the others, taking bottles of sleeping pills. After leaving the hospital for that, I was diagnosed bipolar, OCD, general anxiety disorder, and (although it cannot be technically diagnosed until you are over 18) Borderline Personality Disorder. The highs of my illness are amazing. I am struggling to get a point where I can go unmedicated for that reason. I also feel tired of taking 18 pills a day. For every side affect of one pill there is another pill. Lately I have been experiencing hallucinations of the LSD tripping sort. These do not fit my bipolar illness, and now they are turning to the possibilities of a brain tumor. I just got out of my longest relationship and just had a recent pregnancy scare. I am looking forward to tomorrow because my brother comes home and brings many drugs with him. While being medicated for my illness, I find my life to be not exciting enough. While in the hospital, a visit from an art therapist changed my life. I do get obsessed with things easily, and I'm now obsessed with art. I want to go to art school. I have my perfect life planned out. I know what I want for everything ahead of me. I just have right now, the difficult time, when I do not have the skill of drawing and I want to lose 20lbs. I want to be freakishly tiny and perfect, and I'll do anything to get there. So that's basically me.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Sunday
Tomorrow I have my religion and science exams. I find that I do best if I wake up really really early, turn up the electro music really really loud, and drink amp. Whatever works... I was totally dreading religion class before this ear started, but it has ended up being my favorite class. Its less jesus-y and more hindu and buddhist-y. Now, the math exam occurring on tuesday is another story. It just doesn't work in my head. I am so excited for normal school next year though I can't even explain. I am picturing this like perfect little world that is very disney -esque. I am planning my perfect wardrobe for next year too. Right now I feel like I have no clothes! ugh... I'll blog wednesday but tomorrow I will have to study for math and english. Then it will be summer!!!
Friday, May 23, 2008
Yes Style
Yesstyle.com offers clothing brands from Japan, South Korea, and Hong Kong. There are very beautiful pieces and affordable prices. Check it out. NOW!
Thursday, May 22, 2008
We Are The Superlative Conspiracy
This brand of "swedish rebels" has the oddest advertisements, really cool hoodies, and super noticeable headphones. It is just really, really, really awesome. Available at Revolve Clothing, 80's Purlple, Karma Loop, and Urban Outfitters. Check out the website to view the collection.
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